The Trophy Collection

The trophy collection. A virtual trophy cabinet of all your gaming achievements thus far. Its something that means a lot to the trophy hunters among us and before we go any further I have to say that I love the term; trophy hunter, sounds like a Victorian with shotgun in hand out hunting exotic animals in a swamp somewhere. But I digress. Although for the Trophy hunter the trophy may be the reason to play the game for the rest of us the pop of the trophy will bring on an emotion somewhere between mild apathy (a light shrug) and mild surprise as we didn’t know that what we were doing could earn us a trophy anyway.

Don’t get me wrong I do enjoy ”winning” trophies as much as anyone who has passed a casual eye over ” that friend’s” trophy list. Now stay with me, we all have that friend the one that despite you never managing to actually catch him or her on-line always seems to have twice as many trophies as you on most of the games you both own.

It makes me wonder as I (jealously) scroll through their trophy list if, they will catch me looking through their collection. If an email will somehow pop-up in their inbox or maybe there will just be a banner across the top of the screen the next time they log on saying something along the lines of ”Guess what, you’ll never guess who was here, going through your trophies…again” But I know that cant happen (can it?) and I continue to scroll away giving myself a mental high five in the unlikely event of us both having the same number the trophies in any given game ( thank you, The Walking Dead)

Sometimes I wonder how they do it?I mean I know this person, they are too my knowledge; never on-line, would never normally spend that much time doing a repetitive task for a Bronze trophy. But the list doesn’t lie, and in my more paranoid moments I have come up with a few reasons as for how they do it.

  They sleep game?

Your heard me right. They sleep game. Instead of sleepwalking do they

# and in this wonderful dream they are having are they granted gaming super powers? Super powers that just happen to be an advanced puzzle solving ability, coupled with cat like reflexes and the ability to grind around collecting loot for hours and hours at a time?

Its not them

Is it someone else?. It’s sad to say but, this is probably my most likely reaction on seeing a friends trophy list.It cant be them I say. That’s a lot of trophies for someone who claims not to be that into Call of Duty I say. It must be someone else. That’s not you. A Street Fighter V trophy collection, no, never. A few trophies from the Witness. Not. You. Ever. have you have hired/blackmailed a member of your family? Used a younger sibling’s quicker reflex’s to help you get a win? Or maybe you lent your console to a friend? Yes that’s it. You went away for the weekend. You took your console to a friend to look after and sneakily logged yourself in before you left.Telling that if they log you out, none of the games will work….Even if they are on a disk

They use a guide

Somehow this always comes to me after imagining a conspiracy theory or a cabal made up of friends and members of the public all intent on making me feel bad. Knowing that I look at my friend’s trophy list (did they get that email) they have decided to make me feel terrible by ganging together, exchanging passwords and logins to each others consoles and thus doing all the hard bits my friend can’t do, all just to spite me.

Its me

Sometimes you just to have to face it. Face the sad fact that it is indeed not them but you. Your just not that good at that (all) game (s) That your going to have to, if you can stomach it to go back to the drawing board, start again and just practice, practice until you unlock that Trophy. Or you could, you know, get a guide. Well, which ever is easier